Friday, 21 December 2018


To-day I have learnt that an idea I had years ago was had decades previous by someone else.

Wednesday, 3 October 2018


I had previously attributed my lack of assertiveness and my inability to plan ahead or make decisions to my father's absence growing up, but I now believe they may more directly be attributed to having received no positive reinforcement from my mother at any point.

All she did was nag. When I went away on holiday with my father or grandparents, she would "tidy up" my room and give my toys away. Any project I attempted would be undone as soon as I turned my back. I grew up in constant insecurity, hounded. Nothing was worth doing. Nothing is worth doing.

She loved me, of course, but she never showed it. I remember once she moved to caress my face, likely because there was someone else present, and my instinct was to shy away, as I did not know what that was.

I used to think that she did everything for me, but I now know that to be false. She did not stay with my father, and she made me grow up with no knowledge of what it is to be loved.

Should I be angry? I feel only sadness...

Saturday, 12 May 2018


I had an idea for a voxel-based game, and I've been writing it up.

Thursday, 10 May 2018

Braver And Wiser

I took a leap into the unknown, farther than I ever had before. It turned out for naught, but no ill came of that, and I have grown as a result.

Tuesday, 17 April 2018

The State Of Monarchism In Portugal

To-day I went to the headquarters of the monarchist party, and found it in rather a sorry state...